That’s completely normal. In long-term relationships, it’s natural for the sense of novelty to fade over time—which is why we need to put in the effort to keep things fresh. When things start to feel a little too routine, try these tips:

① Lingerie
If your sex life has been feeling a bit dull lately, try spicing things up with some sexy lingerie. It’s a quick and easy way to rekindle that sense of excitement.

② Toys
Sex is like a game—why not bring in a few fun props to mix things up? Toys, low-temperature candles, blindfolds, whips… explore what you’re curious about and give it a try.

③ Deepen emotional intimacy
Sometimes it’s not that your sex life isn’t fun—it’s that you’ve stopped being attuned to each other’s emotional needs. Maybe you’ve begun to overlook each other’s desire for love, affection, and romance. Try creating romantic little surprises in your everyday life—it might just bring back some of that excitement in bed too.

④ A communication checklist
Just like when you’re dating, sexual chemistry takes time to build—and communication is key. Try writing down your questions, desires, and boundaries about sex on a piece of paper, then exchange it with your partner. Or make it even easier (and more fun) with our intimacy cards—playful questions and activities that help you gradually get to know each other better in an engaging, low-pressure way.

In short, both partners need to put in the effort. You’re in this together!