e direct: Just say, “I don’t feel like it.”
If your partner truly respects you, they’ll prioritize your feelings over satisfying their own desires. Being honest doesn’t necessarily harm the relationship—it helps establish healthy boundaries and supports long-term emotional intimacy.

Suggest other forms of physical intimacy
For example, you can offer to help your partner using toys or your hands. It’s a more relaxed yet still playful alternative, and it promotes emotional connection. If you’re not in the mood for sex, cuddling and kissing are also great options.

Reassure your partner that you’re attracted to and love them
One reason rejection can hurt is that it may cause your partner to doubt their attractiveness or your love for them. That’s why it helps to sincerely express that you do love them and are attracted to them. You can also share why you’re not feeling in the mood right now, to ease their anxiety and reassure them.

Make a plan for another time
If you’re unable to say yes right now due to certain factors, let your partner know you’re open to being intimate when the timing feels right. Setting this expectation helps avoid uncertainty and shows your willingness to stay connected.

In the end, honest communication is key. A partner who loves and respects you will naturally understand.